Early 80's computer graphics

So, i have to admit that, i just watched Tron for the first time recently (thanks Clinton). It was released in 1982! (i was only one!). It's pretty cheesy, but i quite liked it - so i hope they do it justice when making the updated version. A lot of things have changed in the 25+ years since Tron was released but light-bikes are still pretty cool. Check out the opening clip.

Tron Lightbike Scene


Another great 80's graphic accomplishment was The Dire Straits 'Money for nothing' video. This is 1984, and while not a motion picture from Disney, it probably had some decent money. It's nice to know we've progressed well passed this now... although the music hasn't gotten better at an equal pace (i think it's more of a downward spiral).

Dire Straits • Money for nothing


Just thought i'd throw these up here for a little nostalgia. I'll be away for the long weekend so don't expect any posts until the first week of September... but feel free to click on some ads while i'm gone!! That means you Clinton! :o)

Robot Chicken

This show is kinda on the fringe (of what 'normal' people might watch), but it's got some golden moments. Here are some clips that i've found - it doesn't seem like they get taken down like most shows do these days....

robot chicken-star wars-palpatine


"feet wrapped in leathery burnt bacon..."

robot chicken - starwars - yo mama match


Robot Chicken- Star Wars- Jedi Bush

Awesome...

This is taken directly from cracked.com - but i figured people probably wouldn't bother to go there and read it all unless i posted it for them (that's my excuse - click on the ads!!) :o)

How to win a fight against twenty children

by Chris Bucholz

I’m not going to ask why you’re fighting twenty children. That’s your own business, although most reasons are as old as time itself:

1) They started it.
2) You flipped over the table while losing a Magic: The Gathering game, and damaged several rare cards.
3) They stole your woman.
4) You stole their woman.
5) You’ve had enough of their bullshit.

Whether you’re a good man who was in the wrong place at the wrong time, or a dangerous maniac, we here at Cracked want to help. That’s why we’ve consulted with the experts (who did not wish to be named) on how to maximize your odds of winning a fight against twenty children. Follow these guidelines, and your opponents will wish they were never born 6 or 7 years ago.

__

Use an appropriate technique. Modern mixed martial arts are geared almost exclusively towards one on one combat, and are not designed to take on multiple tiny aggressors. As a grown adult, you could be fairly assured of absolutely destroying a 7 year old if you took him to the floor for a ground and pound. But by doing so you’d expose your back and head to his peers. Your best bet is to stay on your feet and use striking techniques. Karate is one good choice - it was originally designed in the 1600’s for use by unarmed Japanese day care workers.

Be aware of the terrain. By default, you’re going to have a height advantage against twenty children, but be sure you don’t cede it. Avoid fighting around picnic tables, monkey bars, or anything with which a particularly daring child could launch an aerial attack. The ideal situation is fighting children who are trapped in a ditch below you.

Stay mobile. Unless you’re extremely lucky and find yourself fighting twenty infants, you’re going to be at a mobility disadvantage when fighting a large group of children. You must avoid becoming surrounded at all costs. Keep moving, and always trying to position the bulk of children on one side of you. Circle, sidestep, and use tactical retreats to try and engage a single child at a time, where your reach and decades of muscular development should prove an advantage.

Speed. You want this fight to be over fast. Children have boundless amounts of energy, and you’ll tire quickly as the fight progresses. If you schedule your fights with twenty children in advance for some reason, I urge you to focus your pre-training regimen on cardiovascular conditioning and snorting eye-wateringly large amounts of cocaine.

Intimidation. Although I don’t expect you to be intimidated by the prospect of fighting twenty children - given the self-confidence that comes with maturity - remember that intimidation is a two way street. Twenty is a big number, and if that many children lose their fear of you, watch out. Use fierce roars and displays of strength to frighten the children. When taunting, remember that children are almost comically stupid, and won’t understand any of your more creative taunts. You won’t intimidate anyone if you have to explain three times specifically what you did to their mother last night.

Go for the leader first. Assuming the twenty children lack military training, they’re going to behave more like a pack of animals than a cohesive group. By default, pack animals will defer to an alpha leader, and if you manage to subdue that child, the rest of the pack will quickly lose their will to fight. In some cases the leader will be actively giving orders and therefore easy to identify. Other times they’ll be harder to pick out. In those cases, go for the tallest one, or the one with the most Pokemon on their clothing. Once the alpha child is lying in a heap, you’ve got a narrow window of intimidation open while the children regroup. I’d recommend lifting his body over your head and screaming yourself hoarse. That’s the smart veteran move.

Groin attacks. In general the crotch is a small, easily defensible target, and not typically a factor in most fights at a reasonably professional level. That said, when children are attacked by an adult, they’re rarely going to respond professionally. Again, if you have forewarning that you’ll soon be coming to blows with twenty children, absolutely wear a cup. If you do get struck in the groin, under no circumstances should you place your hand on your genitals to massage away the pain - touching your privates while surrounded by minors is illegal in many states, and frowned upon in the rest.

Weapons. I’d suggest refraining from using weapons, and not just because of the harsh mandatory minimum sentencing laws that are a sad reality in this modern age. By bringing a weapon you might prompt the children to bring weapons as well. This kind of escalation plays against you. Whereas before you could fairly safely absorb several dozen tiny little punches before being incapacitated, you’re now at risk of being dropped with a single lucky strike. If a child with a pair of safety scissors gets at your Achilles tendon (the groin of the ankle) then you’re cooked buddy.

Let the last one walk away. In Professional Twenty-Child-Fighting Leagues this is now tradition, but even during raw, underground twenty child street-fights it serves an important purpose. By letting that child spread word of your great strength and not-to-be-fucked-withedness amongst the other children of the area, you can ensure that it will be a long time indeed before someone else mewls at you that you’re hogging the swings.

Jerry Seinfeld

Some friends and I were chatting at work, and as usually happens, we started quoting shows and comedy bits. So this morning i went looking at some Jerry Seinfeld clips and found this one - his first HBO appearance back in 1981. You can tell that the audience doesn't quite know how to handle his humour yet - but they do warm up to him eventually. Little do they know what a force he'd become in the future. There's also a nice little intro by the Smothers Brothers - who are also quite funny. Enjoy.

Jerry Seinfeld HBO Debut - 1981

History

You know, a lot of things have changed since 1997... one of those things is my ability to build a 'reasonable' website.. This is a link to my first webpage, ever! Be sure to check out my 'Ultimate Computer' page - it's sure to be a Crysis-level machine...

Sam's Skate Shack

How can i not post this!?

Just watch, you'll find out.

You know what he did?


I wouldn't want it to happen to me that's for sure.

Street Painting

I've seen a few of these videos now and figured it would be a good time to share them. These guys are obviously super talented. But it's just crazy how detailed their work is. It's only chaulk, but it looks so good!

Kurt Wenner
This guy does some very classic paintings and has a bunch of movies on his site. Check out the documentary that was done on him back in '86. The following video will probably be appreciated by the people who visit this site regularly...

Kurt Wenner - Gears of War


Julian Beever
This guy does some really cool 3D work with his drawings and they're generally pretty light-hearted afairs. He's got a bunch of pictures of his work on his site. Enjoy.

Julian Beever Chalk Drawings

Tiger Woods

So apparently there was some 'glitch' in the new tiger woods game where you could hit a shot from the water. Well apparently it's not a glitch and Tiger does this kind of thing all the time... Great to see a big company like EA playing along with things.

"Jesus Shot" feature


Tiger doing his thing

Rodney Mullen

If you've known me for longer than a few months, you probably know that I've done some skateboarding in my slightly younger years. As such, i'm still pretty into things (i just got a new deck! w00t) - and Rodney Mullen is definitely one of my favorite skaters. The guy is a machine, he does things that no one even thinks of or does anymore - but they're always amazing. check it out for your self!

Rodney Mullen

Plain and simple

This is amazing - http://www.futurenerd.net/strike-terror-with-a-disintegrator-rubber-band-gun/

DISINTEGRATOR


The action starts around 1:40

Line Rider

If there's one thing the internet has done (and i'm sure there is more than one), that thing would be giving people a way to waste their time on completely useless things (like blogs even...). But for this post we turn to Line Rider - really cool, but definitely a time waster. Apparently it's even been moved off the internet into 'real' gaming platforms - see Wikipedia article.

Below are some of the more ridiculous line rider videos i've found:

Jagged Peak Adventure


One Eyed Giant


Super Mario Bros. 1-1

Bicycle Ballerina

This has been around for a little while, but it's impressive no matter how old. The bike is a bit crazy looking, but watch the whole thing and see some seriously amazing bike skills (And she's a girl!!)... :o)

Bicycle Ballerina

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

Why women hate Star Wars...

Cuz Darth Vader comes to kill them in their own beds....

Homeless James Bond

Homeless James Bond


Courtesy of my good friend Peter.

The Human Camera

Found on this site: http://www.autoadviceoffl.com/Dealership/Diseases.php

1. Photographic memory

We have all heard of people with so called "photographic memories". Usually we use it when referring to someone who has an above average ability to recall information about the past or about their surroundings. True photographic memory of the kind exhibited by Stephen Wiltshire is truly a rare but amazing gift. Mr. Wiltshire is an autistic savant and those that know him call him "the living camera". When he was 11 years old he drew a perfect representation of the aerial view of London after a single helicopter ride, down to the correct number of windows on the major buildings of the city. This is perhaps one of the coolest feats of the human brain I have ever seen. Below is a video of Stephen Wiltshire showcasing his abilities.

Stephen Wiltshire: The Human Camera

David Blaine Street Magic

I was always impressed with David Blaine's magic. He's done some pretty far out stunts in the recent past, but as with anyone in the public eye, he's been mocked. Below is a sample of some 'real' David Blaine and below that is the 'mock' david blaine - funny stuff.

Magician David Blaine Impresses Tyra Banks


The Mocking begins...

David Blaine Street Magic


David Blaine Street Magic (part 2)


David Blaine Street Magic (part 3)

More Stop-motion fun

This guy is pretty amazing/talented. I'm assuming that he has some decent musical ability - otherwise he's a genius. Enjoy

Stop Motion Piano And Drums

- Watch more free videos

Speeches

Most of the time speeches are boring, unless of course you go to an ivy league school where you can get Seth McFarlane or Ali G to speak... stupid rich kids.

ali g harvard speach part 1


ali g harvard speach part 2


Seth MacFarlane's Harvard Class Day Speech (1 of 4)


Seth MacFarlane's Harvard Class Day Speech AS PETER (2 of 4)


Seth MacFarlane's Harvard Class Day Speech STEWIE (3 of 4)


Seth MacFarlane's Harvard Class Day Speech QUAGMIRE (4 of 4)

I hope this isn't a fake

If this game exists, then it needs to be marketed much better. (wait till the end, it's worth the wait)

Family Guy vs. Capcom

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

Amazing Game - LevelHead

This is such a cool idea, and it seems to be implemented so well. This is the kind of stuff that push the boundaries of how we interact with media/games/computers. Check it out!

levelHead is a spatial memory game by Julian Oliver.

levelHead uses a hand-held solid-plastic cube as its only interface. On-screen it appears each face of the cube contains a little room, each of which are logically connected by doors.

In one of these rooms is a character. By tilting the cube the player directs this character from room to room in an effort to find the exit.

Some doors lead nowhere and will send the character back to the room they started in, a trick designed to challenge the player's spatial memory. Which doors belong to which rooms?

There are three cubes (levels) in total, each of which are connected by a single door. Players have the goal of moving the character from room to room, cube to cube in an attempt to find the final exit door of all three cubes. If this door is found the character will appear to leave the cube, walk across the table surface and vanish.. The game then begins again.

LevelHead

levelHead v1.0, 3 cube speed-run (spoiler!) from Julian Oliver on Vimeo.

6 Million dollar home theatre...

This is a bit much.. honestly, who has this kind of money!?!?

Kipnis-Studios : Cinema Beta

If you won the lottery, how much would you spend on an entertainment room? Probably less than music producer Jeremy Kipnis. He has put a cool $6 million into his "home theater".

Here’s a partial list of the gear he’s using:

Video
Sony SRX-S110 Professional Video Projector
Stewart 18-by-10-foot Snowmatte 1.0 Gain Laboratory-Grade Motion Picture Screen

Players
Sony BDP-S1 Blu-ray Player
Sony PlayStation 3 Gaming Console
Toshiba HD-XA1 HD DVD Player
JVC HMDH-5U D-VHS Recorder
Hard drive that holds 72 hours of HDTV
Mark Levinson N° 51 DVD/CD Media Player
Pioneer HLD-X0 Hi-Vision HDTV MUSE Laserdisc Player

Amps
McIntosh MC-2102 Amplifiers (30)
Crown Macro Reference Gold Amplifiers (3)
Mark Levinson N° 33h Amplifiers (2)

Speakers
MuRata ES103A Super Tweeters (10)
Snell THX Music & Cinema Reference LCR-2800 Center-Channel Speakers (3)
Snell 1800 THX Music & Cinema Reference Subwoofers (16)
Snell THX Music & Cinema Reference Towers (8)

Surround Processing and Decoding
Theta Digital Generation VIII 32-bit 8x Oversampling Dual Processors (13)

Strongbad & Homestarrunner

This website, homestarrunner.com, is something that i haven't kept really up to date on but i have enjoyed it considerably in the past - so i assume you will also enjoy it (if you don't already know about Strongbad/Homestarrunner). Homestarrunner, as you can find out by checking out the wikipedia article, has been around for quite a while and has developed a pretty large following. So much so that they've recently released a game for the Wii (and PC) - Strong Bad’s Cool Game for Attrractive People. I haven't tried it yet, but i've embedded the trailer below:



Here are a couple of my favorite SB emails (something to pay attention to is that, generally, at the end of the episode there's some clickable content to get a little extra feature - or if you just wait around something will happen). Not all the time, but a lot of the time:

Techno

Guitar

Dragon (aka Trogdor the Burninator)

Feel free to post your favorites in the comments section. The Halloween episodes are also worth checking out - try to guess what each character is dressed as.

Blow up a whale, what's the worst that could happen?

This is a classic internet video (although it was aired in 1970!). You'd like to think that it doesn't take a genius to realize that a 9 ton whale and half a ton of dynamite is a bad idea... It's funny how you can hear all the blubber falling on the beach. Try explaining the car incident to your insurance company.... "honestly, a huge chunk of whale blubber fell out of the sky and crushed my car while i was at the beach..."

Enjoy!

Oregon's Exploding Whale - 1970

Airplane

Airplane! is a great 1980's parody. Unlike the current crop of junk (i.e. Epic Movie or Scary Movie 2) it actually holds up over time. I've added a few clips and the trailer to give you the general feel of the movie.

Airplane! Trailer


June Cleaver speaks Jive


Airplane! - "Joey, have you ever...."


"Joey, have you ever been in a Turkish prison?" - Great.

Keeping with the 'movie' topic, if you haven't seen Shaun of the dead (see post from earlier today) or Hot Fuzz, you should check them out. Their not big budget films by any means, but they're better than a lot of the million+ dollar junk that Hollywood is willing to put out.

Store Wars

Not a lot to say here. This is a great Star Wars parody with vegetables/fruits. Enjoy

Store Wars

Danger, 50,000 Volts

If you've seen Shaun of the Dead or Hot Fuzz, you'll recognize both of these chaps. In this episode of Danger 50,000 volts, Nick Frost and Simon Pegg show you how to handle an outbreak of zombies.

Part 1


Part 2


Part 3

Nick Thune

Caught this guy on stumbleupon video and the few clips i've seen of him i've liked. Check out his website http://www.nickthune.com/ for more info on him. Here are a couple clips that i've enjoyed so far.

instant messenger song


weed timeline

Great Conan moments

Some people don't get him apparently, but Conan is by far the best late night host. Enjoy.

The Best of Conan from ConanFan

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

Obi Wan Kenobi buys a used car

Listen carefully to what he says and the questions he asks. If you haven't seen the original star wars (living in a tree perhaps?) then most of this won't make sense... Enjoy.

Obi Wan Kenobi buys a used car

The IT Crowd

I can't recall how i first heard about The IT Crowd, but it was probably on slashdot or something. Anyways, it's a great, British show about a small corporate IT department and the ridiculous characters that dwell within it's bowels. The official site is here. There are a few full episodes available on youtube - check out Chadner's videos for a good selection. I'll embed a couple clips below.

The IT Crowd - Calamity Jen (part 1 of 3)


The IT Crowd - Calamity Jen (part 2 of 3)


The IT Crowd - Calamity Jen (part 3 of 3)


I'll set this one up a little bit. The guys get invited out to a new musical called "Gay" - which is pretty self explainitory. Roy has to go to the bathroom, but there's a long line so he decides to go to the wheelchair/disabled bathroom. Hilarity ensues...

"I'm Disabled"

Rush and Colbert

Not everyone is into Rush (my wife for example), and that's fine - just as long as you're not Canadian and a supposed fan of good music... that's all i'm saying. I'm not sure how long this clip will be up on youtube, but you can sometimes find these at the comedy networks website. It's pretty obvious that the Colbert report guys are big Rush fans - it's too bad things get cut a bit short at the end, but no biggie.

In case the Youtube version gets pulled, the Comedy Network Version is available for your viewing pleasure.

Rush on the Colbert Report

Here's another video of Rush playing one of their songs on Rock Band before the show.. on expert!

Rush playing Rock Band

Official FOTC 'Ladies' video

I think this has been out for a little while now, but when it comes to letting people know about Flight of the Conchords, the old is new again... or something... "Amphibians"

Exclusive YouTube premiere: Flight of the Conchords video for "Ladies of the World" from their self-titled LP on Sub Pop Records and the HBO series "Flight of the Conchords".
Directed by Nima Nourizadeh / Partizan

Ladies of the World

MadTV - Jackass

Kenny Rogers + Jackass + MadTV = one of the best skits (that i've seen) from MadTV. Here are both parts. I always enjoy the section around 2:48.

Classic line: "hey, you got eggnog in my goat milk"

Kenny Rogers Jackass Parts 1 & 2

Triumph The Insult Comic Dog Addresses, Terrorizes Comic Con!

As always, Triumph does his thing.

For the birds

Just saw this on bestofyoutube.com and actually laughed (out loud) a bit. I love these nature films, and when birds start doing Seinfeld, what's not to love!?

The Amazing Lyrebird of Australia - Unseen Footage

People can't fly!!

Apparently, no one told these people that you can't....

Ski Gliding
Extreme Ski Gliding


MSP's wingsuit segment from "Seven Sunny Days"

Demotivators

I'm sure many people have seen the motivational posters that often line the hallways of corporate buildings or school halls/classrooms. Well, in general, things don't always turn out as rosy as we may have hoped, but thankfully there's Despair Inc. to take our pain and inabilities and make mocking posters of them..

Bitterness


Change



Consulting

Large Hadron Collider nearly ready

This thing is an amazing piece of engineering. Check out the link below to see some amazing pictures of the thing that could change the way scientists look at the universe and atoms.

The Large Hadron Collider (LHC), a 27 kilometer (17 mile) long particle accelerator straddling the border of Switzerland and France, is nearly set to begin its first particle beam tests. The European Organization for Nuclear Research (CERN) is preparing for its first small tests in early August, leading to a planned full-track test in September - and the first planned particle collisions before the end of the year. The final step before starting is the chilling of the entire collider to -271.25 C (-456.25 F). Here is a collection of photographs from CERN, showing various stages of completion of the LHC and several of its larger experiments (some over seven stories tall), over the past several years. (27 photos total)

Slippery much?

I already told you that i'm off today, so the posts keep coming.... I'm not sure where this is, but its obvious that it's very slippery and that the road has a bit of a slope to it (i assume). Got a nice 4x4... doesn't matter - crash.

Bumper cars

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

People are awesome

This is another one of those 'i have no idea how long it would take to do something like this but it must have taken a very long time' type things. Project Game Over is

one of the art projects developed by the French-Swiss artist Guillaume REYMOND (NOTsoNOISY creative agency). It consists of a series of collaborative animation movies which revive some of the very first video games. The pixels are replaced by a group of real human-beings that are moving from seat to seat in a theatre during about 4 to 6 hours. Each "pixel" has its own rules and decides what s/he wants to do for each picture. Once all these pictures are turned into a short animation movie, a giant human-scale video game unfolds "live".

You can check out all the info and the videos here, but i've also embedded them here for your convenience (i'm right nice like that...)

Tetris (won the 2007 Youtube award for 'Creative' video)


Space Invaders


Pong

Japan is crazy

'Crazy' here means odd, strange, interesting, cool... The Japanese just do things way different than the rest of the world (or at least North America). Case in point, Kasou Taishou. Basically people perform really interesting/bizarre skits using people in black outfits to shadow the main actors or to allow them to perform Matrix-like movements. The most famous one that i've seen is the ping pong one below, but the other ones are equally entertaining.

Matrix Ping pong


Shadow Basketball


Olympics

Jeux Olympiques (Kasou Taishou) olympic games
Uploaded by revotrx

Feel free to post any videos that you may have found, in the comments section.

Worst summer job, ever!

If you can't tell, i have the day off today so there may be more posts to come.... Anyways, just saw this video and thought that whoever had to setup all the coins must have had some frustrating moments.. I'm sure you know this but coins generally 'roll' when places on their edge, and depending on the surface they'll have considerable trouble staying up... Anyways enjoy this video of 10,000 pounds (british, not lbs) being used for dominoes.

Coin Dominoes

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

Telemarketer Prank

I've seen/heard this clip about a dozen times, but it's still hilarious. The scene is setup in the clip so i won't prolong the wait. Enjoy.

Telemarketer Prank

Telemarketer prank - Click here for funny video clips

Cats

Many of you may know that my wife and i recently got a new kitten from the SPCA. If you didn't, well he's a picture of her:

Anyways, the internet is full of cute cat/pet videos so i figured i'd be silly to miss out on the craze. So here are a couple cute and/or funny clips of cats being cats.

Laser Kitten


Thirsty Kitten


Animal Shelter cat of the week

Loving, my ass!!

More funny cat videos available here: http://www.funnycatvideos.net/